A medical clinic in Cleveland, Ohio, for $125.00, will install your mobile phone in your body, in your back, adjacent to spinal cord and connected to sacral cord, allowing instant access to smart features, hand-free, of most advanced phone/computer technology. The clinic/company is called ‘biophone’ and was founded by neurosurgeon, Yannis Baptiste, M.D., Ph.D., and communications engineer, David Matthew, Ph.D. Your phone will be reduced to three interconnected nanochips sealed in collagen. You will be able to share information with any internet device and even print same to a patented wireless printer developed by Hewlett-Packard. Your nanophone is operated by mental command; is opened or closed by mental password. Website information to follow.

{Ahem.}